Tuesday, March 20, 2012

Men, Women, and the not so obvious difference.

I'm taking this blog in a new direction.

The magical thing about acceptance is that it allows you to surrender. And surrender reduces your attachment to a certain thing or outcome, which typically results with less pain.

Feeling unable to write about love, I surrendered to the possibility that I couldn't write effectively about something so close to my heart. So I re-engaged myself in writing about what I know: finding happiness regardless of life's experience and circumstance.

In this acceptance and surrender, I let go of the attachment I felt to what this blog needed to be and something unexpected happened. I had an idea.

I've been examining male/female energy and relationships for the last couple of years. Because I'm single and date quite a few men, I have a built in research pool at my finger tips. Literally. ;-)

Then it hit me. Why not write about what my male/female, man/woman, masculine/feminine energy and relationship research is showing me?

Writing about love turned out to be difficult for me. Probably because I'm still waiting for my knight in shining armor to show up. :-) But in the meantime I'm learning incredible things about love, men and women, the not so obvious difference, and balance. And that's what I should be writing about. Whether anybody reads it or not.

I have a theory. I feel that feminism has failed us. I believe it has messed us up and done our relationships, our children, and our society an unfortunate dis-service. I didn't start out with this theory. But the more men I dated and the number of similar stories I heard, I started to see a pattern. But it will take some time to explain all that. So for now I think I'll just begin with some heartfelt counsel to my beautiful friend, Stacie. She's going through something painful right now.

Stacie, as a woman you are wired to feel, be, and receive. So stand in this experience you're having and FEEL every bit of it. Just be in this right now. Hurt, feel sad, feel confused, feel heartbroken, feel every bit of pain that washes over you. Let yourself feel it. Don't try to push it away or feel it less. Be a girl and feel your heart ache. And softly say how you're feeling.

Then in these moments of hurting and loss, let the men around you do what they are wired to do. Let me them help you. Receive the help and comfort they want to give you. It will help you all feel better.

The not so obvious difference between us...

Women: feel, be, receive.
Men: think, do, give.

Balance. God knew what He was doing.

"Simplicity is the ultimate sophistication." Leonardo da Vinci said.

It's not that we (male or female) can't think, do, give, be, feel, and receive, obviously. It's just that things have their time and place and peace is only possible when we work to harmonize our differences. In any regard.

Life would be so much easier if we'd stop trying to make it so hard. ;-)

I feel excited about this adventure!! :D

And Stacie, my prayers are with you. Practice receiving. The only thing you need to "do" is say thank you. I love you.

1 comment:

  1. received! and hoping to be able to pass along something wonderful to those i love who are hurting so much....i have to give a little so that others can receive too. (haven't you heard about my testosterone levels....i do wear the pants most often.)

    Kathleen, really, this is a beautiful post, insightful and utterly perfectly what your heart knew mine needed. I think that I found this a few times in the embrace of another's hug. And your words....wowed me. love you